Inappropriate Things to Wear/Take or Do at Funerals

**MissyO** · 09-02-2007, 09:49 AM

Alright, most of you will know by now I have a funeral to plan.

But I need to see the bright side of this. So please amuse me with some funeral humour!

**Ophelia** · 09-02-2007, 10:03 AM

Red leather pants a lowcut black bouse and a red feather boa. Red stiletto's.

Show up visably wasted and kiss all the men on the mouth leaving bright red lipstick stains everywhere you go. Light up a cig during the service.

Announce your pregnancy during the eulogy and then throw up on the priest.

**MissyO** · 09-02-2007, 10:07 AM

Perfect

**Ophelia** · 09-02-2007, 10:11 AM

or....arrive stoned and giggle all throughout the service. Make a beeline for the refreshment table, knocking over old ladies along the way.

**MissyO** · 09-02-2007, 10:56 AM

Damn, I don't know that we have many old ladies in the family..... Otherwise I'd try it.

**Jocasta** · 09-02-2007, 11:54 AM

Darn it, Op's good at this unsuitable behaviour thing!

I've been to a biker funeral where, obviously most of the guests were in leathers. So how about that, black leather jeans and biker jacket with thigh high boots and a ripped ACDC T-shirt... of course you have to arrive on a Harley.

The best part though, was the end music... weirdly, Nelly The Elephant.

**Ophelia** · 09-02-2007, 12:21 PM

^that is odd.

**Ophelia** · 09-02-2007, 12:45 PM

A musical number!

Keri · 09-02-2007, 01:33 PM

^ Aw, I miss Six Feet Under.

Good lord though, I want Ophelia to come to the next funeral I have to go to please?

**Ophelia** · 09-02-2007, 02:03 PM

Happy to Keri, but I hope thats not anytime soon. (Insert winky smilie)

Blackmask · 09-02-2007, 08:16 PM

Have a book to read and only look up from it to heckle anyone who's speaking. Leave early, apologising loudly to make sure everyone knows you are going somewhere more important.

**MissyO** · 09-02-2007, 08:42 PM

Shout 5 minutes into the ceremony "When's the phucking strippers getting here?!?!"

**Plastic Flute** · 09-02-2007, 09:01 PM

^ be nice ..you child.

**MissyO** · 09-02-2007, 09:06 PM

Me??? Child??? NEVER!!!!

**Bill5461** · 09-04-2007, 06:36 AM

Accidently spill your beer in the coffin

**Ophelia** · 09-04-2007, 07:35 AM

^ Never spill beer for any reason.

Grab the preachers azz - fall alseep snoring loudly during the service.

**Jocasta** · 09-04-2007, 09:04 AM

Hit on the deceased's other half.

**Ophelia** · 09-04-2007, 10:45 AM

Fart loudly during the moment of silence.

Keri · 09-04-2007, 11:22 AM

Haha!

Talking of farting...

**Bill5461** · 09-04-2007, 01:37 PM

I can watch that scene over and over..thanks Keri

Make sure to bring a plate of food in with you, something very crunchy

09-02-2007, 09:49 AM	#1 (permalink)
MissyO Perennially Disgruntled Join Date: Jun 2006 Location: Sydney Posts: 4,104 My Profile	Inappropriate Things to Wear/Take or Do at Funerals Alright, most of you will know by now I have a funeral to plan. But I need to see the bright side of this. So please amuse me with some funeral humour!

09-02-2007, 10:03 AM	#2 (permalink)
Ophelia JOHO Join Date: Mar 2005 Location: Joshtopia Posts: 6,966 My Profile	Red leather pants a lowcut black bouse and a red feather boa. Red stiletto's. Show up visably wasted and kiss all the men on the mouth leaving bright red lipstick stains everywhere you go. Light up a cig during the service. Announce your pregnancy during the eulogy and then throw up on the priest. Last edited by Ophelia : 09-02-2007 at 10:04 AM.

09-02-2007, 12:45 PM	#8 (permalink)
Ophelia JOHO Join Date: Mar 2005 Location: Joshtopia Posts: 6,966 My Profile	A musical number! Last edited by Ophelia : 09-02-2007 at 01:23 PM.

09-02-2007, 08:16 PM	#11 (permalink)
Blackmask Protector of Inanity Join Date: May 2002 Location: Australia Posts: 6,158 My Profile	Have a book to read and only look up from it to heckle anyone who's speaking. Leave early, apologising loudly to make sure everyone knows you are going somewhere more important. Last edited by Blackmask : 09-02-2007 at 09:06 PM.

09-02-2007, 09:01 PM	#13 (permalink)
Plastic Flute ICHiBAN HoOT Join Date: May 2006 Location: New Jersey Posts: 12,798 My Profile	^ be nice ..you child. Last edited by Plastic Flute : 09-02-2007 at 09:04 PM.

09-02-2007, 10:07 AM	#3 (permalink)
MissyO Perennially Disgruntled Join Date: Jun 2006 Location: Sydney Posts: 4,104 My Profile	Perfect

09-02-2007, 10:11 AM	#4 (permalink)
Ophelia JOHO Join Date: Mar 2005 Location: Joshtopia Posts: 6,966 My Profile	or....arrive stoned and giggle all throughout the service. Make a beeline for the refreshment table, knocking over old ladies along the way.

09-02-2007, 10:56 AM	#5 (permalink)
MissyO Perennially Disgruntled Join Date: Jun 2006 Location: Sydney Posts: 4,104 My Profile	Damn, I don't know that we have many old ladies in the family..... Otherwise I'd try it.

09-02-2007, 11:54 AM	#6 (permalink)
Jocasta Joshtopian Join Date: Sep 2002 Location: Shaftesbury Avenue Posts: 17,771 My Profile	Darn it, Op's good at this unsuitable behaviour thing! I've been to a biker funeral where, obviously most of the guests were in leathers. So how about that, black leather jeans and biker jacket with thigh high boots and a ripped ACDC T-shirt... of course you have to arrive on a Harley. The best part though, was the end music... weirdly, Nelly The Elephant.

09-02-2007, 12:21 PM	#7 (permalink)
Ophelia JOHO Join Date: Mar 2005 Location: Joshtopia Posts: 6,966 My Profile	^that is odd.

09-02-2007, 01:33 PM	#9 (permalink)
Keri Kiss My Pom Poms Join Date: Jan 2005 Location: UK Posts: 4,018 My Profile	^ Aw, I miss Six Feet Under. Good lord though, I want Ophelia to come to the next funeral I have to go to please?

09-02-2007, 02:03 PM	#10 (permalink)
Ophelia JOHO Join Date: Mar 2005 Location: Joshtopia Posts: 6,966 My Profile	Happy to Keri, but I hope thats not anytime soon. (Insert winky smilie)

09-02-2007, 08:42 PM	#12 (permalink)
MissyO Perennially Disgruntled Join Date: Jun 2006 Location: Sydney Posts: 4,104 My Profile	Shout 5 minutes into the ceremony "When's the phucking strippers getting here?!?!"

09-02-2007, 09:06 PM	#14 (permalink)
MissyO Perennially Disgruntled Join Date: Jun 2006 Location: Sydney Posts: 4,104 My Profile	Me??? Child??? NEVER!!!!

09-04-2007, 06:36 AM	#15 (permalink)
Bill5461 Scarlett Mod Join Date: Oct 2005 Location: Upstate New York Posts: 11,769 My Profile	Accidently spill your beer in the coffin

Currently Active Users Viewing This Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)

09-04-2007, 07:35 AM	#16 (permalink)
Ophelia JOHO Join Date: Mar 2005 Location: Joshtopia Posts: 6,966 My Profile	^ Never spill beer for any reason. Grab the preachers azz - fall alseep snoring loudly during the service.

09-04-2007, 09:04 AM	#17 (permalink)
Jocasta Joshtopian Join Date: Sep 2002 Location: Shaftesbury Avenue Posts: 17,771 My Profile	Hit on the deceased's other half.

09-04-2007, 10:45 AM	#18 (permalink)
Ophelia JOHO Join Date: Mar 2005 Location: Joshtopia Posts: 6,966 My Profile	Fart loudly during the moment of silence. Last edited by Ophelia : 09-04-2007 at 10:45 AM.

09-04-2007, 11:22 AM	#19 (permalink)
Keri Kiss My Pom Poms Join Date: Jan 2005 Location: UK Posts: 4,018 My Profile	Haha! Talking of farting...

09-04-2007, 01:37 PM	#20 (permalink)
Bill5461 Scarlett Mod Join Date: Oct 2005 Location: Upstate New York Posts: 11,769 My Profile	I can watch that scene over and over..thanks Keri Make sure to bring a plate of food in with you, something very crunchy