Oh yeah I know just what this feels like! But probably a hundred times worse. Don't worry I feel great empathy for you! Ok this must have happened to a lot of other here too. As a silly teenager I did some dodgy pills which were supposed to be pure but actually just ketamine and speed and rat-poison. We had a terrible dealer at university. After an hour you know that you've just taken ketamine, so feeling annoyed, but you're a jittery idiot by this stage as opposed to your usual happy person. And then we drove miles out to this birthday party where we didn't know anyone. Already feeling nervous. And then did a few spiffs in front of television. And then I lost my friend who was supposed to drive home. And then I talk to the horrible local birthday types who weren't friendly or hospitable and also smelt of cheap beer from tesco. And then cue complete panic attack! Mood plummets first I think and then later you start thinking through every bad scenario possible, and then your mood plummets more, and then you think even more bad stuff, and then your mood plummets more, ect, ect. The thing is you can't control your thoughts so they follow your mood in a helter skelter downward spiral. Luckily thank god never get this sober. |