I hit the ole X after that.
Sammy: Next time I hit Europe I will personally serve as your chaperon and take you up to Red Light District.
The most celebrated Amsterdam bordello is Yab Yum, Singel 295 (tel. 020/624-9503; open daily 8pm-4am), in a 17th-century canalside mansion, and named for a goddess of love from the Kama Sutra.
The women, all well educated, well spoken, gorgeous, and between the ages of 18 and 24, are strictly moonlighting. Most are reportedly flight attendants, nurses, students, and housewives. The clientele is businessmen, jet-setters, and kinky couples into threesomes or orgies.
A bouncer leads you up the stairs and rings a buzzer. An elegant man initiates you into the establishment's mysteries. The interior is replete with stalagmite chandeliers, pin-cushion red-velvet walls, gold encrustations, etched-glass nudes, a lounge with a splashing Venus fountain, and a U-shaped bar where the ladies perch on stools. The price: about 70€ ($88) to get in, and 200€ to 600€ ($250-$750) for champagne while you chat.
Innocent entertainment and expense can stop there. If it doesn't, and you're able to pony up around 1,500€ ($1,875), you follow a faux leopard-skin carpet leading to luxury rooms fitted out like the extravagant whorehouses of Hollywood Westerns but with whirlpool tubs.